September brings two important opportunities to check in with the people around us. In 2026, R U OK? Day falls on Thursday 10 September, followed by Dementia Action Week from 15–21 September. World Suicide Prevention Day is also observed on 10 September.
These may seem like separate moments, but they share one important theme: connection matters. Checking in can open a conversation with someone experiencing changes in memory or thinking, someone living with dementia, or the person quietly carrying the responsibility of caring for them.
Connection and brain health
Loneliness vs Social Isolation: What’s the Difference?
Loneliness and social isolation are different but related concepts. Social isolation describes having limited social contact, relationships or participation, while loneliness is the personal feeling that you do not have enough meaningful connection. A person can feel lonely while surrounded by people, or have limited contact without feeling lonely.
What Australian Research Shows About Loneliness and Dementia Risk
Australian academic research presents a nuanced picture. In a 2022 study of 11,498 relatively healthy, community-dwelling Australians aged 70–94, researchers from Monash University and the ASPREE research group found that social isolation and low social support were associated with poorer cognitive function among women. However, the study did not find consistent longitudinal associations between baseline social health and later cognitive decline or dementia over the follow-up period.
A later Australian cohort study used data from more than 12,000 adults aged 70 and over and followed participants for a median of eight years. After adjustment for other factors, new-onset loneliness in men and persistent loneliness in women were associated with a greater risk of dementia. Changes in social isolation and low social support were associated with cognitive decline, but not with dementia in the same analysis.
These studies describe associations, not proof that loneliness alone causes dementia. They also do not show that one conversation, social activity or community program can prevent dementia. Dementia Australia therefore, describes social isolation as a recognised modifiable risk factor associated with developing dementia, rather than something that can be changed with a guaranteed result. Based on that insight, it is still worth pursuing.
Why Small, Consistent Connection Still Matters
The pursuit of connection will look different for everyone. It might be a regular phone call, a shared meal, a walk with a neighbour or returning to a familiar community activity. For someone who has become isolated, the most helpful offer may be small, predictable and easy to accept.
Ask the carer too
When someone is living with dementia, conversations often focus on their memory, safety, appointments and daily needs. The person providing care can disappear behind the diagnosis. Yet their burden is just as unrelenting as for the person with the condition.
The Hidden Toll of Caring: What the Data Shows
Australian research has shown that carers can experience substantial social isolation. The 2022 study analysed data from 5,585 carers who participated in the Carers NSW 2020 National Carer Survey. More than half—56.2%—were classified as socially isolated. Greater isolation was associated with longer caring duration, more hours spent caring each week, living with the person receiving care, caring for more than one person, receiving no help from others and higher psychological distress.
This study included carers supporting people with many different health, disability and ageing-related needs. It was not limited to dementia carers, so its findings should not be presented as a dementia-specific estimate. It does, however, help explain why the carer’s own wellbeing and social connection need to be part of a health conversation.
A carer may be skipping their own appointments, sleeping poorly, missing work or quietly making decisions they never expected to make. They may love the person they care for and still feel exhausted, frightened, frustrated or unsure what to do next. Those feelings do not make someone a bad carer. They are signs that the carer deserves to be included in the conversation and that conversation needs to cover respite and burnout.
What checking in looks like
A meaningful check-in does not need to be dramatic or perfectly worded. It is usually more helpful when it is specific and gives the other person time to answer.
How to Start the Conversation
You might say, “I’ve noticed you have not been joining us for your usual coffee. How have you really been going?” To a carer, you could say, “You have had a lot to manage lately. How are you holding up—not just with the caring, but with everything else?”
R U OK? recommends asking, listening with an open mind, encouraging appropriate action and checking in again. Its guidance also makes clear that you do not need to fix someone’s problems or manage a difficult conversation alone.
The next step is to listen. Try not to rush to reassure, solve the problem or compare their experience with someone else’s. You could respond with, “That sounds like a lot to carry,” or, “Thank you for telling me.” If they are not ready to talk, let them know you still care and will ask again.
Practical support can make the offer more meaningful. Instead of saying, “Let me know if you need anything,” try offering something specific: “I can sit with Mum while you attend your appointment on Thursday,” or, “I’m going to the shops tomorrow. What can I bring you?”
When to See Your GP About Memory or Cognitive Changes
If you have noticed changes in someone’s memory, thinking, behaviour or day-to-day functioning, book an appointment with your GP rather than trying to work out the cause from an online checklist. Queensland Health’s dementia guidance explains that dementia assessment is primarily clinical and may include a carer-reported history. It also highlights the importance of considering the carer’s physical and mental health and providing appropriate support.
Queensland Health’s cognition and recall guidance describes assessment for possible cognitive changes and further investigation where appropriate. It also recognises that information from someone who knows you well may contribute to understanding changes in memory or everyday functioning.
If caring is affecting your mental health, your GP can discuss assessment, supports and referral options. Depending on your circumstances and eligibility, Medicare may contribute to eligible mental health services through a GP Mental Health Treatment Plan. Services Australia explains that a GP may assess your mental health needs and create a plan where the relevant requirements are met.
In some situations, a family member or carer may be able to participate in up to two sessions as part of the mental health treatment of the person they support. This is not an automatic entitlement for every carer: consent, clinical appropriateness and Medicare requirements apply.
Support for a Carer’s Own Mental Health
You can also contact Carer Gateway, an Australian Government program providing free services and support for carers. Carer Gateway may provide information about counselling, peer support, respite and other services, subject to eligibility and assessment. Call 1800 422 737, Monday to Friday, 8 am to 5 pm.
Queensland carers can find additional information through Carers Queensland. It is best to be proactive. Trying to obtain assistance when you are in crisis is the worst time to get help. Carers Queensland has team members who can help anticipate what might be next and line up supports before they are required.
When the answer is not OK
R U OK? Day and World Suicide Prevention Day are not only about general wellbeing. If someone tells you they are thinking about suicide, or you are worried they may not be safe, take them seriously.
Stay with the person while urgent support is arranged where possible. Call Triple Zero (000) if there is immediate danger. Lifeline is available on 13 11 14, and Beyond Blue on 1300 22 4636. R U OK? also advises seeking professional support when someone needs more help than friends, family or colleagues can provide.
You do not need to have the perfect response. You do need to listen, take what they say seriously and help connect them with appropriate support.
A conversation worth starting
Connection does not need to look the same for everyone. For one person, it may be a weekly visit. For another, it may be a short text message, help attending an appointment or sitting quietly together without needing to fill the silence.
This September, consider who may have become isolated, who may be experiencing changes they are unsure about, and who has been caring for someone else without being asked how they are managing.
Whether you are worried about changes in your own memory, concerned about someone close to you, or finding it increasingly difficult to keep caring, you do not have to work out the next step alone. Book an appointment with the team at Sandstone Healthcare Yeerongpilly to discuss your concerns and the support or referrals that may be appropriate for you. We see you as a whole person, not just the conditions you have. For carers, that is the opportunity to have fruitful conversations with someone they trust. Someone who believes good care is about what we can address today, what we need to plan for tomorrow and what we can do together!
Medicare eligibility, referral requirements and out-of-pocket costs vary. Your GP can explain the options relevant to your circumstances.
Further Reading: Trusted Australian Resources
- Australian Institute of Health and Welfare. (2025). Social isolation and loneliness. https://www.aihw.gov.au/mental-health/topic-areas/social-isolation-and-loneliness
- Carer Gateway. (2024). What is Carer Gateway? Australian Government. https://www.carergateway.gov.au/about-us/what-carer-gateway
- Carers Australia. (2025). Caring for others and yourself: Carer Wellbeing Survey 2024 report. Prepared by the WellRes Unit, Health Research Institute, University of Canberra. https://www.carersaustralia.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2025/02/Final-CWS-2024-Report-compressed.pdf
- Carers Queensland. (n.d.). Carers Queensland. https://carersqld.com.au/
- Dementia Australia. (2025). Risk factors for developing dementia. https://www.dementia.org.au/brain-health/risk-factors-developing-dementia
- Htun, H. L., et al. (2025). Changes in loneliness, social isolation, and social support: A gender-disaggregated analysis of their associations with dementia and cognitive decline in older adults. Alzheimer’s & Dementia: Translational Research & Clinical Interventions. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC11882408/
- Joyce, J., et al. (2022). Social isolation, social support, and loneliness and their relationship with cognitive health and dementia. International Journal of Geriatric Psychiatry. https://research.monash.edu/en/publications/social-isolation-social-support-and-loneliness-and-their-relation/
- Queensland Health. (2024). Cognition and recall: Chronic Conditions Manual. Queensland Government. https://www.ccm.health.qld.gov.au/adult-health-checks/cognition-and-recall
- Queensland Health. (2024). Dementia: Chronic Conditions Manual. Queensland Government. https://www.ccm.health.qld.gov.au/management-of-diagnosed-conditions/dementia
- Poon, A. W. C., Hofstaetter, L., & Judd-Lam, S. (2022). Social connectedness of carers: An Australian national survey of carers. Health & Social Care in the Community, 30(6), e5612–e5623. https://doi.org/10.1111/hsc.13987
- R U OK? (n.d.). How to ask R U OK? https://www.ruok.org.au/how-to-ask
- R U OK? (n.d.). You can talk. https://www.ruok.org.au/you-can-talk
- Services Australia. (2025). Mental health care and Medicare. Australian Government. https://www.servicesaustralia.gov.au/mental-health-care-and-medicare
- Services Australia. (2026). MBS billing rules for mental health services. Australian Government. https://www.servicesaustralia.gov.au/mbs-billing-rules-for-mental-health-services
